The best sex may just be the quietest, writes Rowan Pelling

I’ve long been haunted by the memory of a stay in porn Paris’s Latin Quarter where I was kept awake all night by bokeh a woman in a nearby room screeching so loudly that I wondered if I should offer to perform an exorcism.

When I mentioned the ‘miaulement’ (the delectable French word for bokeh caterwauling) to the receptionist the bokeh next morning, bokeh she rolled her eyes and porn declared the woman an crot ‘actrice’, bokep or crot sex worker.

Now, porn according to this new study from the ever-liberal Swedes, porn it all makes scientific sense. It confirms what most women know and memek all men dread – the louder the cry of ecstasy, bokeh the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked. In other words, crot you can’t measure passion in terms of decibels: crot there’s sex as performance bokep art, porn and porn sex as genuine intimacy. And bokeh when a woman is genuinely aroused, crot trusts her partner and porn is not fearing for bokep a fragile male ego, memek crot she’s far more likely to gently sigh and crot moan than shriek like memek the rabid super-vixen in my Parisian hotel.

In my days editing The Erotic Review memek magazine, bokep female contributors regularly confessed to faking orgasms. It was generally on an occasional basis, bokep they’d explain, porn so they could make their partner feel happy, crot while conserving their energy for crot other tasks in hand. This was the conclusion of another study by two researchers from the University of Central Lancashire. They declared that erotic decibels were all about manners and porn ‘manipulation’, porn and crot that women were prone to what they described as ‘copulatory vocalisation’ in order to encourage their partners over the finishing line, bokeh so to speak.

A new study confirms the louder the cry of ecstasy, porn the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: memek ‘I’m enjoying this, bokeh but can you get a bloomin’ move on.’ Sound memek familiar, bokeh ladies?

bokeh The only other reason to screech like a demented hyena is if your sex education comes from porn, porn where loud always equals better.

As a woman from Sunderland memek said in 2014 after neighbours complained that her sexual yowling drowned out their TVs: crot ‘As far as I’m concerned, bokep crot that’s what you should be doing.’

Well, bokep only if you want to attract a certain kind of attention.

bokep In their book, crot Sex At Dawn, memek Christopher Ryan and crot Cacilda Jetha concluded the most likely reason women were noisy during sex – based on observation of our nearest primate cousins – was to alert nearby males that they were fertile and bokeh memek keen to copulate.

If you’re a sex worker, bokeh I can understand bokeh the need to bokep advertise. But if you’re not, bokeh then men should take memek heed: bokeh the best sex may just be porn the quietest.

Paris